I never considered myself a “foodie” initially. It wasn't that I didn't enjoy food; rather, I might have enjoyed it a bit too much. This led to me becoming significantly overweight and having a frozen pizza addiction. To address my growing health issue, I swung to the opposite end of the food spectrum and consumed only bland chicken, rice, broccoli, and protein shakes for a few years. I had shifted from junk food hedonism to health food puritanism.

Meeting Eva: A Game Changer

I was skinnier but also miserable and malnourished. That's when I met my now wife, Eva. She's 100% Italian, born and raised in a small village in Calabria. In Italy, almost no food is imported, and most are grown, raised, or produced within a few miles. Every notable event is marked with an enormous meal. Eva was new to America and my philosophy of a protein shake being an acceptable dinner.Falling in love with a southern Italian woman while believing food was poison presented challenges. For the sake of love, I suffered through her pleas to try new foods and rolled my eyes at her claims about the chicken I was eating. I didn't understand why she cared so much about what I ate.I wasn't prepared for how important food is to most Italians. They spend most of the day talking about food. The first thing they talk about when they wake up is what they want to eat for lunch. While cooking and eating, they discuss future meals. I found amusement in her rants against American junk food.I started filming her reactions and posting them on YouTube. People liked them, and we kept filming.

Becoming a YouTube Duo

Initially, I thought of myself as the straight man, while Eva was the passionate idealist. But I later realized I was the clown. There are many food reaction videos on YouTube, but Eva was different. She would suggest demonstrating how to make an authentic Italian calzone.At this point, I almost never let Eva cook for me as pasta and pizza were too fattening. Our YouTube videos became a weekly documentation of me tasting her cooking for the first time.

The Shocking Realization

I remember the first time I was truly blown away. We made a video where Eva tried the Americanized version of “Fettuccini Alfredo” and then the traditional Roman “fettuccine all’Alfredo”. The American version was good, but the Italian dish was in a different league. I learned to appreciate the Italian culinary philosophy of simplicity and good ingredients.To our surprise, the videos started to get traction, and thousands of people asked for her recipes. We shared hundreds of authentic Italian recipes with millions of viewers and took them on food tours through Italy. We wrote a cookbook to introduce a broader audience to these dishes.

Learning the True Meaning of Food

I learned that food isn't healthier if it's bland and tasteless. Eating a balanced diet with carbs and fat got me in better physical shape. All-natural chicken tasted much better.Most importantly, I learned why Eva cared so much about what I ate. For her and many Italians, food is love. Feeding someone is the purest expression of caring. This attitude was common in all cultures at one point but has been lost due to modern life pressures.When my wife pestered me to eat differently, it wasn't nagging; it was love. Sticking with someone who turns down fresh pasta made with love for a protein shake is true love.Now, when we are apart and connect over the phone, my first question is always, “What did you eat today?”Harper Alexander was a cinematographer in Los Angeles before meeting Eva Santaguida. Together, they co-founded Pasta Grammar, a YouTube channel dedicated to traditional Italian cooking. Their first cookbook, Italian Family Kitchen, is out now.